Gah, its been too long...it was that job mostly, then the sloth that not having that job anymore gave me the right to wallow in. And being sick. And sucking at life.
There I've made my excuses. Now onto the meat of it all.
I spend every day in this evil little slow funk. I never have sex with my boyfriend anymore. I don't know why exactly. I just dont really feel like I want to. Its this icky feeling that comes when I think about it. Its not him. At least not in a tradiontional way.
It might be all the stress, I don't know. It seems like every day I'm mad at him for a hundred little things. It makes it hard to come back to it all and be like "That is the man that sets me on fire" because mostly he's that man that makes messes and laundry and tries to do nice things like bring home a lobster, but leaves its dead rotting carcas in his cooler for 8 hours on the kitchen counter, so when I go to make him lunch my nice little "suprise" is a giant stinky mess for me to clean up :/
I don't know. He's always been like this, and for the first 3 years we had sex all the time. Even when we started living together. Now....nada. For weeks..months maybe now. The last time was that one day that Jon was over and I asked him about all of us. So april? See what I mean?
What am I supposed to do about it? I could try and come onto him, but I don't really remember how...or think I could do it right if my heart wasn't into it. I just don't know. Its bullshit.
On a positive note my sweet baby Peep is prego :) At least i'm about 95% sure. The little prince finally figured out how to use his junk on her last heat so i'm pretty sure its a go :) And she's been eating like a horse, which is the direct opposite of how she usually eats. only a mothful or two was her usual breakfast, now she pushes Teen Tine (the prince) out of the way and mows down :) At least the *Cats* can manage to have sex. Sigh.
